I have recently discovered that I have a new nighttime hobby, aside from peeing 52 times a night. Apparently, I’m a videographer. Yes, that’s right. I have started recording video with my phone while I am asleep. Dead-ass, as the kids say. Oh, get your head out of the gutter.

I woke up yesterday to discover that I had managed to record a video of just the black top of my night table (so, basically no video) and 33 minutes of proof that my husband suffers loudly from sleep apnea. My smart ass daughter asked, “How do you know it’s him snoring and not you?” To which I replied, “He sleeps on the other side of the bed. If it were me, it’d be louder.”

As far as middle-of-the-night habits go, this one is not so bad as it is easily delete-able. It doesn’t really do much to take away from my actual sleep time, as does that bastard raccoon that keeps climbing onto my windowsill banging around at 3 am looking for food. I cannot wait until we can actually catch HIM in the trap rather than all these stupid feral cats around here. I digress.

There really isn’t much to add to this. I just figured I should share SOMETHING since I haven’t posted in a while and clearly everyone should know more about me and my boring life. I’ll post a photo of the Pain-In-The-REM-Cycle Raccoon just to attract viewers. Don’t be fooled by his cuteness. He is a jerk who eats all the cat food and then throws trash into their water bowl just to be mean.

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