Our toilet tank is broken…again. My husband has tried everything he knows to fix it and we’ve resolved to flushing with a bucket of water. It’s easy. It works. Whatever.

So I’m filling the bucket up and I happened to look in the mirror and noticed it.
Wow. I’m totally not ever wearing this t-shirt again in front of people. I guess it’s just par for my asymmetrical course. I mean, I have one eye bigger than the other, one ear lower than the other and one foot with a big ghastly birthmark while the other looks normal. You know, as normal as boxy feet shaped like Daisy Duck’s can look. But I’m seriously considering entering a room with my left shoulder cocked forward so that it’s not so noticeable that my right boob is more than half a cup size bigger than the left one.

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